Mediator:
Mediation is an elegant process of
conflict resolution. As a mediator,
I set ground rules for the mediation
making it a safe place to work
through conflict. I remain neutral,
listen deeply, ask clarifying
questions, and repeat what I heard
to be sure of what the person is
saying. This allows the other
person in the mediation dyad to be
an observer and, therefore, to be
able to listen more sincerely. Each
person has an opportunity to speak
and be heard, before we begin the
process of looking for possible new
ideas and solutions to the issues.
I love this process and have seen
miracles happen as people say “I
didn’t know you felt that way”. It
is often difficult for people to
really listen when they are talking
with someone during a conflict,
because they can be busy deciding
how to respond to convince the other
person to do what they want them to
do. By teaching them to listen
without having to prepare a
response, clients can often relax a
bit, knowing that they will get an
opportunity to say all they need to
say. This also provides an
opportunity for them to see the
situation from a new perspective.
In
mediation, I take notes to make sure
that we deal with as many issues as
possible. I assist my clients to
come up with agreements and
practical solutions that will really
work. We even write the agreements
and have both people sign them so
they can have it in writing.